The Soul Of Noel Gallagher

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Oasis leader Noel Gallagher digs deep to chat about the band’s latest album.

It may have been a long time coming, but Noel Gallagher is a new man these days. At 41, the Oasis leader is older, wiser, and altogether calmer – a far cry from the hard-partying hedonist who frequently got into fistfights with his vocalist kid brother, Liam, both onstage and off. Now a mature father of two, the guitarist has not only come a long way from the band’s Britpop-defining 1994 debut, Definitely Maybe, but is now prone to penning deep, reflective processionals like those featured on Dig Out Your Soul, the latest set from Oasis, which instantly topped charts around the world upon its recent release.

After a few surreal wake-up calls of late – including the horrific experience at Toronto’s recent V-Fest where a crazed audience member angrily attacked him onstage for no apparent reason – Gallagher has revamped his life philosophy. “I don’t have an ‘all are welcome’ kind of policy,” he notes soberly. “My own thing now is that I know what’s best for me. Other people can tell me what’s best for them, but to me it’s all live and let live. But I don’t let people into my life, and I don’t try to walk into their lives. As long as I know who I am and stay true to my self, then everything’s cool with me.”

Gallagher may have changed, but get him talking, and that old sardonic snarkiness starts to resurface. Oasis diehards wouldn’t have it any other way.

The Wave: On the new album’s bonus-disc track, “Lord, Don’t Slow Me Down,” you sing “I’ve got a habit that the cat won’t lick.” What bad habits do you still have?
Noel Gallagher: Smoking and drinking, I still do that. But apart from that, not many.

TW: You look remarkably slim and healthy for your age. Did you change your diet, start working out?
NG: About three years ago, I suffered real bad back problems. I went to see a guy in London, and he sent me to a sports therapist, who said, “If you don’t start doing some exercise, in about five years you’re gonna be f***ed.” I’ve always shied away from exercise, pretty much because of the clothes, the gear you have to wear when you do it. But I got so addicted to it, I kept it going. I went and actually did boxing – I put the gloves on. So we did a bit of that, and just getting on these fairly complicated machines that strengthened my back. But I got so into it, I was doing it three days a week. I think the key is, if you exercise, you can eat whatever you want, so I haven’t changed my diet in any way.

TW: When you were boxing, did you go a round or two with anyone?
NG: No, it wasn’t real boxing. It was just gentle sparring. And I’ve got to say, I wasn’t very good at it. The thought of it is better than the actual doing it. I’d get my face smashed in if I was in the ring – I don’t have the killer instincts.

TW: Are you still recovering from the incident in Toronto where you were tackled on stage?
NG: No, no, no, it’s all fixed, it’s all gone – and it’s been two months now, really. He broke three ribs and bruised another five. Why? I dunno. He’s been up in front of a judge in Canada and the case was adjourned, so nobody’s heard his explanation yet. But he hasn’t got an explanation – he’s just an idiot. There is no logical explanation for why people do things like that.

TW: You’ve often said that you’ve learned a whole new way of walking through urban environments, where you stare straight down at the sidewalk and never make eye contact with potential nutcakes like that.
NG: I live right in the middle of the West End in London. It’s surprising how much privacy you get when you’re just surrounded by millions of people. I don’t get noticed at all. So I guess being in the eye of the hurricane, that’s where the calm is.
If I was to be the famous rock star down at the end of a leafy street in the suburbs, you’d get more hassles because everybody would know where you lived. But I live right off a main high street, and nobody bats an eyelid at me.

TW: I thought you’d moved to rural Buckinghamshire.
NG: I’ve got a place there, too, but I moved because I kinda missed the heartbeat of the city. There are only so many months of the year you can spend in solitude. I like to hear police sirens; I like to hear the choppers overhead. I like to hear traffic, because it gives me a sense that I’m part of something. But I’m lucky enough to have two places, so when I get pissed off at the city, I can go live in the country for a while. But I’m always drawn back to the city, because that’s where it’s at. I like to be surrounded by people.

TW: Dig Out Your Soul touches on death, religion, and the question of the hereafter. Those are some heavy issues.
NG: A lot of people have said that. I’m not a morose person that would think about mortality a great deal. But for my own part, I find writing about God and religion interesting.... I’m not really a believer in any sense, but I’m curious about the imagery of it all. And I’m fascinated by people who are so into religion in a big way. You live in America and I live in England, but you know the religion I’m talking about.

TW: Well, it’s only the fundamentalists who demand that you believe just as they do.
NG: You just hit the nail on the head. You can worship whatever you want, but you can’t then say that I’m not allowed to worship nothing. It’s like, “You just be cool and be happy with who you are, and I’ll be cool and be happy who I am, and the world will be a better place.” That’s my ideal for living. If you believe it and it makes your day-to-day existence better, if you can insert that kind of thing into your life and it works for you, then brilliant. Personally, I don’t need to believe that I will find redemption or that there will be a God who will judge me at the end of all of that. I believe that you get one shot at this, and it’s on Earth, so I’m not waiting for a second chance when I walk into the light. When they finally put me in the ground, that’s it. It’s over for me, done. I will rest in peace.

TW: So when you say “Dig out your soul,” do you believe you actually have one to dig out?
NG: Liam’s always bangin’ on about soul and blah, blah, blah, but I’m confused as to what it means. To me, it’s music. I listen to Motown and think, “Well, that’s got soul,” but I don’t know what that fu**ing means. The line comes from one of Gem’s [Archer, band guitarist] songs, and it’s actually when you’re at a party and someone’s putting on a record, it’s like, “Can you put a soul record on? Dig out your soul!” Like in a DJ type of sense.

TW: The new album has that hip-shaking, vintage-soul groove all the way through.
NG: That wasn’t the plan going into the studio. We’ve got more British rock ’n’ roll songs in the bag that we intended to record, but our producer, Dave Sardy, heard two or three songs that had that groove and said, “I need some more songs like this – do you have any?” And I said, “Well, not really, but I’ll write some!” And it was the first time we ever let him direct the whole piece. I wrote the bulk of my songs in the studio, and we’ve hit on the novel idea that every other band’s been doing for the last 15 years: “Hey, let’s let the producer produce it!”

TW: Returning to what we were initially discussing, it’s not so bad to actually slow down a little, right? You’ve got kids now – you need to stick around.
NG: Oh, yeah, totally. It’s not cool to be into drugs when you’ve got children, no matter which way you look at it. You have a responsibility to see them grow up, and then you have a responsibility for them to see you as a role model, I guess, in that this is how one lives one’s life. I mean, I don’t want my kids to grow up and think I was never there, physically or mentally. I want them to see me as… as just plain old dad.

Oasis plays Oakland’s Oracle Arena on Dec. 3. Tickets available from www.oraclearena.com.

Source: www.thewavemag.com

Oasis Piano Covers

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Supersonic



Some Might Say



Slide Away



The Stone Roses - Made of Stone (Added this as it's simply beautiful and I love the song also)

These Piano Covers have been done by R - Thomas, visit the YouTube channel here.

Wacky Music Vids For Deaf Are Web Hit

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A wacky music lover has become a huge hit on the internet after using sign language to make pop videos for the deaf.

Hundreds of thousands of people have viewed Tyrone Whittle’s unique interpretations of classic tracks by The Arctic Monkeys, Oasis, and The Smiths, which he performs in public.

The 43-year-old can be seen signing the lyrics to the songs as he strikes some unusual dance moves in public places ranging from trains stations to shopping centres.

Tyrone has built up a massive repertoire of other hits on YouTube by bands such as The Verve, The Cure and Coldplay.

The smooth mover started performing his routines after a life-long interest in using movement to communicate and in a bid to impress his former partner.

After learning sign language through a book, and refusing to allow his lack of dance practice to hold him back, his reputation blossomed.

He said: “My ex-wife complained that I never did anything romantic for her.

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“I know it sounds strange but I decided I would impress her by learning sign language and performing a dance for her using signing.”

More than 40,000 web users have viewed his performance filmed on a train platform of I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor by The Arctic Monkeys.

And Don’t Look Back In Anger by Oasis has attracted 20,000 hits, while I Know It’s Over by The Smiths has gone 5,000 better.

Source: www.thesun.co.uk

Oasis Announce Japanese Tour

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Oasisinet is pleased to announce that Oasis will be touring Japan in March 2009. The tour will mark the band's first Japanese performances since November 2005. The tour kicks off in Nagoya on March the 18th, then the band visits the city of Sapporo the capital of Hokkaido for the first time and then culminates in Osaka and Tokyo.

Tickets are available to Pre-Sale Reserve on 22nd Nov at 10am until 11pm on 30th Nov.

General Sale begins on Saturday 13th December from 10am through Ticket PIA, Lawson Ticket, e+, Smash and Smash-Mobile.

The full details of the tour are below:

Wednesday 18-Mar-09 - NAGOYA Nihon Gaishi Hall (ex. Rainbow Hall)
Sunday 22-Mar-09 - SAPPORO Makomanai Ice Arena
Tuesday 24-Mar-09 - OSAKA Intex
Wednesday 25-Mar-09 - OSAKA Intex
Saturday 28-Mar-09 - TOKYO Makuhari Messe, Hall 9
Sunday 29-Mar-09 - TOKYO Makuhari Messe, Hall 9

Source: www.oasisinet.com

Kasabian Raring For Oasis Tour

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Kasabian have said they're looking forward to playing with Oasis after long-term fan Noel Gallagher invited them on their stadium tour.

Singer Tom Meighan said: "The fact he likes us is just nice, it's a plus."

Kasabian will play as guests of Oasis over seven dates in June and July next year, concluding the tour at Wembley.

After a relatively quiet 2008, the band say they can't wait to get back out on the road when the third album comes out in the New Year.

"There's gonna be a hell of a lot of noise," said guitarist and singer Serge Pizzorno.

"It'll be almost deafening I think, we'll be banging on everyone's door."

"We're just going to tour… tour, tour, tour," added lead vocalist Tom Meighan.

"We're gagging to get back out you see, after some time off. We're real on stage, that's who we are and there's not many people left like that anymore."

"It's a great line-up and the chance to play to all those people is a gift," added Serge.

Not to mention of course, the chance to make some of the festivals squirm.

"The problem is all the same bands play the same year. You get the same headliners, nothing really happens.

"We might just not do any next year and just wait until 2010. Then when we do turn up, everyone's gonna be like: 'Wow this is going to be special, this is going to be incredible', rather than: 'Oh it's them again. And again."

You won't get any disagreement from Tom, who is not the world's biggest festival fan either.

He said: "I don't really enjoy it. I don't really like hanging around.

"If we're playing it's great, but the toilets, the portaloos, the whole situation's horrible. Stick me in a hotel room or something, I'm alright."

"Then again," argued Serge, "When festivals are special, when things happen, they're the most amazing places to be."

The band got briefly reacquainted with their fans at the Union Chapel in North London over the weekend - where they performed as part of the Little Noise Sessions in aid of Mencap.

Source: www.bbc.co.uk

Ricky Hatton's Set For A Wonderbrawl

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Ricky Hatton reckons he will be top of the pops in more ways than one when he faces Paulie Malignaggi on Saturday night.

Superstar rock brothers Liam and Noel Gallagher will carry his IBO and Ring Magazine belts into the ring before the bout gets underway.

And in Hatton's personal chart he has placed them at No4 as he spoke for the first time about his Oasis pals.

He said: "Noel and Liam are going to carry both of my belts into the ring.

"When I think of the most important things in my life, there's my family first and Campbell my son, then I've got boxing, next comes Manchester City, then it's Oasis."

Hatton came close to persuading the Gallaghers to perform in the ring but schedules blocked it.

The Hitman, 30, added: "If they wanted to perform before the fight it's something that could happen. At the moment they’re touring America and it might not be the right time.

"They're coming to the fight, staying over and then they fly out the next day.

"I'd be happy to let them put on a performance but maybe after this fight and possibly for a future fight.

"I'm sure they would love it and I'm sure we could look at it at a future date."

Hatton has been blasting out Oasis CDs as he prepares with new trainer Floyd Mayweather Snr for his first fight back in Vegas since he lost his unbeaten record to Mayweather Jnr last year.

But it has not gone down too well with his trainer who has had Hatton running up the mountains wearing massive combat boots.

He said: "The first day I went into Floyd's gym all I could hear belting out was James Brown.

"I thought 'What is this s***e?' so I took it off and put on some Oasis.

"Floyd was slagging me off for my taste but it was good fun.

"I'm a bit of a karaoke merchant. There aren't many songs I don't know — Floyd has started calling me the white Luther Vandross."

As for the boots that have been like anchors around his ankles, Hatton added: "I look like Sylvester Stallone in Cliffhanger.

"It's really hard work with the air being so thin and I'm running at nearly 8,000ft above sea level.

"I've never felt as tired as I do after a session with Floyd but I feel better for it."

Source: www.thesun.co.uk

Bid For A Pair Of Signed Wellington Boots By Noel Gallagher For Water Aid Charity

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As winter starts to wrap it’s icy fingers around the Northern Hemisphere, it’s time to start pulling your seasonal clothes out of the bottom of the drawers and closets. And if you want something a little different to go splashing through the puddles and snow this year, why not check out the celebrity boot sale currently on eBay.

Jay-Z, John Mayer, KT Tunstall, Amy Winehouse, Noel Gallagher, James Blunt, Katie Melua, The Arctic Monkeys, Kate Moss and a host of other stars decorated boots at this year’s Glastonbury Festival in the UK, and now the footwear will raise money for Water Aid, an organization that provides clean water, sanitation and hygiene education in Africa and other parts of the developing world.

These navy blue Hunter for WaterAid limited edition Wellington boots have been signed by Noel Gallagher for WaterAid, one of Glastonbury's official charities.

No 1001

Size 11

'God Bless, Noel Gallagher' signed in gold pen on the ankle of booth the left and right boot.

Visit the auction here, for more information on WaterAid visit www.wateraid.org.

Win Some Cool Oasis Prizes

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Want to bag some exclusive Oasis goodies? Here's your chance - we've added more tracks to our Beat The Intro game and we want you to name them after a mere five seconds.

In celebration of 'I'm Outta Time' hitting the racks on December 1st, we've added all the songs from 'Dig Out Your Soul' to our Beat The Intro game and we're offering an Oasis goodie bag to one person who can name five Oasis tracks in a row. What's in the goodie bag? How about this: a tiny Oasis guitar amp, Shock Of The Lightening 7" vinyl, 'I'm Outta Time' CD, playing cards, pin badge and bag.

We're challenging you to prove your knowledge of Oasisness with our incredible Beat The Intro game. Are you mad fer it?

Entries close at midday on December 1st. Click HERE to play

Source: www.xfm.co.uk

'I'm Outta Time' Demo Available To Pre-Order From The Official Oasis Website

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EDIT IT'S NOT A DEMO BUT A MISTAKE BY OASISINET

On the Official Oasis website, they are now offering the chance to pre-order the demo version of 'I'm Outta Time' for 79p.

'I'm Outta Time' is released December 1st on the band's Big Brother Recordings label.

The single is taken from their number one album, 'Dig Out Your Soul'.

Click here for more information, also fans who pre-order the special bundle for £4 will also get a free poster.

Liam & Noel Gallagher To Carry Ricky Hatton's Belts Into The Ring In Las Vegas Next Weekend

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Noel and Liam Gallagher, from Oasis, will carry Ricky Hatton's belts into the ring for his bout against Paulie Malignaggi in Las Vegas on Saturday, the IBO and Ring light-welterweight champion has revealed.

The job has been carried out by Wayne Rooney and Marco Antonio Barrera. “When I think of the most important things in my life, there's my family first and Campbell my son, then I've got boxing and Manchester City and then it's Oasis,” Hatton said.

Source: www.timesonline.co.uk

Top 40 Selling Albums In The UK This Week

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01: Il Divo - The Promise
02: Stereophonics - Best Of - Decade In The Sun
03: Girls Aloud - Out Of Control
04: Kings Of Leon - Only By The Night
05: Pink - Funhouse
06: Enya - And Winter Came
07: Enrique Iglesias - Greatest Hits
08: Celine DionMy Love - The Essential Collection
09: Snow Patrol - A Hundred Million Suns
10: Christina Aguilera - Keeps Gettin' Better - A Decade Of Hits

11: AC/DC - Black Ice
12: Sash - The Best Of
13: Mariah Carey - The Ballads
14: Fron Male Voice Choir - Voices Of The Valley - Home
15: Status Quo - Pictures - 40 Years Of Hits
16: Razorlight - Slipway Fires
17: Seal - Soul
18: Katherine Jenkins - Sacred Arias
19: Will Young - Let It Go
20: Ne-Yo - Year Of The Gentleman

21: Smiths - The Sound Of
22: Script - Script
23: Katy Perry - One Of The Boys
24: Andrea Bocelli - Incanto
25: Daniel O'Donnell - Country Boy
26: Cliff Richard - 50th Anniversary Album
27: Bette Midler - The Best Bette
28: Jason Donovan - Let It Be Me
29: Boyzone - Back Again - No Matter What
30: Keane - Perfect Symmetry

31: Oasis - Dig Out Your Soul
32: Jonathan Ansell - Forever
33: Duffy - Rockferry
34: Kaiser Chiefs - Off With Their Heads
35: Katie Melua - The Collection
36: Scouting For Girls - Scouting For Girls
37: Saturdays - Chasing Lights
38: Rihanna - Good Girl Gone Bad
39: The Verve - Forth
40: Miley Cyrus - Breakout

Source: www.bbc.co.uk

Gem Archer Joins Weller On Stage For 'Echoes Around The Sun' At The BBC

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In an exclusive BBC4 session filmed at BBC Television Centre, Paul Weller performs numbers from his double album, 22 Dreams, hits from throughout his solo career, including From The Floorboards Up and Peacock Suit, plus a couple of classics from the Jam's back catalogue.

Weller performs with his regular five-piece band and is joined on some numbers by the Wired Strings and a brass section. He also has special guests, including Oasis guitarist Gem Archer on Echoes Round the Sun, fiddle player Eliza Carthy on Wild Wood and Where'er You Go, and former Blur guitarist Graham Coxon on Black River.

Watch the show here (UK ONLY)

Source: BBC & YouTube

Oasis - I'm Outta Time (Official Twiggy Remix)

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Oasis will release their new single, "I'm Outta Time" on their Big Brother Recordings label on 1st December.

The single, taken from the album "Dig Out Your Soul", comes in various formats, including two collectors’ edition 7” singles and remixes which feature an exclusive remix of "I’m Outta Time" by Marilyn Manson bassist, Twiggy with Dave Sardy, as well as remixes of album tracks by Neon Neon and Jagz Kooner.

Source: Via YouTube

Oasis On Filter Magazine (DOWNLOAD FOR FREE)

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With so much good music in the world today, one magazine just isn't enough to keep up.Here you have our most sleekly designed handheld yet.

If Filter Biggie (as we in the Good Music Guide department like to call it) is your mag of choice for the War Against Tastelessness (and it damn well should be), then this shiny little devil is for the streets—just call it your back-pocket indie argument ender.

Here you'll find our added two-fold online bonus: not only can you download your own copy for free, you can click on every artist we write about and be instantly transported to their home on the web.

So if your interests are peaked (and they damn well should be), put that itchy trigger finger to use and click away.

Without further ado, we present to you the greatest quarter-sized music mag out there:

Filter Good Music Guide.Download a PDF version of Filter Good Music Guide for FREE by right-clicking and choosing "Save Target As...".

DOWNLOAD PDF NOW

Please be sure to have the latest version of Adobe Acrobat Reader.

Source: www.filter-mag.com

Top Of The Pops To Return To The BBC?

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Top of the Pops looks set for a return to television screens, just two years after it was axed for falling ratings.

BBC executives have hinted that the show could be revived, with music industry insiders suggesting that it could be revamped for the YouTube generation with more populist acts and exclusive songs that viewers could share online.

Artists and record labels concerned about the lack of popular music on television have been lobbying for Top of the Pops to be brought back since it was dropped in March 2006 after 42 years.

Mark Cooper, head of music entertainment for BBC TV, said that he wanted the weekly show to return and that low ratings need not be a barrier.

"It's a Sleeping Beauty. One day it will come back, in the way that Top Gear and Dr Who came back," he told The Times.

"It's probably no longer the case that Top of the Pops can be revived on the basis of it being an entertainment programme – instead it may have to be judged as a public service."

The show could return to schedules within a year, it was claimed. The BBC is thought to be considering putting on a Christmas special, after rebuffing Simon Cowell's offer to buy the rights for a one-off Top of the Pops on ITV.

Singer Lemar recently raised the matter with Andy Burnham, the Culture Secretary, at a Downing Street breakfast, and Oasis frontman Noel Gallagher has also called for the show to return to screens.

"Because people don't have that shared experience of pop music, and it being their own... people start getting into weird s--- and knifing each other," he said last month.

Top of the Pops regularly pulled in audiences of 14 million in its heydey in the 1970s, but fell to little more than a million before it was axed.

Source: www.telegraph.co.uk

Liam Gallagher's Pal Has A Brilliant ID-ea

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Liam Gallagher is backing a brilliant new fashion accessory that could save lives on wild nights out.

The Oasis frontman, pictured with the new invention backstage at a recent gig, was introduced to UTag by his head of security.

It’s a genius device — a dogtag with a memory chip holding your address, next of kin and important medical information.

Former SAS soldier Phil Campion, a pal of the Oasis camp, had the idea when in Afghanistan and Iraq.

He said: “Authorities can get in touch with your loved ones straight away. Liam was keen for his kids to wear them.”

The tag costs £24.99 from utagice.com. Phil is making a donation to Sun-backed charity Help For Heroes for every one sold.

Source: www.thesun.co.uk

Gem Archer With Paul Welller On BBC 4 Tonight

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UK Only

14 Nov 2008, 21:00, BBC Four TONIGHT
14 Nov 2008, 22:30, BBC HD TONIGHT
15 Nov 2008, 01:10, BBC Four
17 Nov 2008, 00:00, BBC Four
17 Nov 2008, 03:00, BBC Four

In an exclusive BBC4 session filmed at BBC Television Centre, Paul Weller performs numbers from his double album, 22 Dreams, hits from throughout his solo career, including From The Floorboards Up and Peacock Suit, plus a couple of classics from the Jam's back catalogue.

Weller performs with his regular five-piece band and is joined on some numbers by the Wired Strings and a brass section. He also has special guests, including Oasis guitarist Gem Archer on Echoes Round the Sun, fiddle player Eliza Carthy on Wild Wood and Where'er You Go, and former Blur guitarist Graham Coxon on Black River.

Source: www.bbc.co.uk

Oasis On The Front Cover Of Marvin Magazine

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Oasis are on the front of 'Marvin' magazine in Mexico this month, if anyone has any scans or pictures of the magazine please send them in.

Gracias: OasisBrother :)

Oasis - Coldplay Double Bill In Near Future?

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(photo: rockographer.com)

Coldplay.com cought up with Chris Martin on the road and talked to him about Coldplay's Touring plans and his thoughts on Oasis' Be Here Now album..... Here are some excerpts:

You're playing in the UK right up to Christmas, with the last show on December 23rd in Belfast.

Yeah. And I would also like to do something on Christmas Eve, but I'm not sure if it's possible. I have to say, it does feel weird that we haven't been in Britain at all. Over the last week or so, the realisation of that has really hit. But I think next year we'll make up for it.

Is that a hint towards future plans?

Well, we tried to get Knebworth but it just wasn't possible. So we're having to think of something else. In fact, I think we have thought of something else. Hopefully we'll be able to announce it soon. And hopefully it's not the same day that Oasis have booked it.

Although that would be a good double bill.

It would be a great double bill. And we wouldn't mind opening. I would also, funnily enough, open for Take That. We were in the dressing room yesterday and, for whatever reason, we started singing Back For Good. We sang the whole thing, word for word, with all the right chords on our piano, without having to learn it or anything. It was great. So I'd like to use this forum, the Coldplay website, to announce that if Take That want us to open for them, we'll do it. The only problem is that we'll have to get down the gym for a bit.

Chris' thoughts on Be Here Now Album

..... Because the price of a burger is often linked to its quality. Cheap burger usually means bad burger and vice versa.

Do you think so? Does that work with music too? Could we be like Be Here Now, reassuringly expensive? By the way, could I go on record and state that Be Here Now is a great album?

Not even Noel Gallagher thinks that.

No, Noel doesn't like it, but I do. I think it's got great songs on it. I think My Big Mouth is one of Oasis's best songs.

But that album is just too long.

Well that's also known as X&Y syndrome. Every band gets it. But for anyone reading this, they should listen to the song My Big Mouth by Oasis, because it's wonderful.

I gotta agree with him there BHN is awesome.

Source: www.coldplay.com

Now It’s Official...I’m Cool. Why? Because Liam From Oasis Said So!

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There's an unwritten code of conduct we all have to follow when we’re working out in the gym.

You’ll see the notice on the wall about wiping down the machines when you’re finished, not using mobile phones, and stopping if you feel breathless.

But these other rules are just as important.

They govern how we interact with the men and women who’re training at the same time as us.

You won’t find these rules written down anywhere and they’re rarely talked about, which is why so many of us feel awkward trying to get them right – or get them totally wrong.

Say too much to other people in the gym and you come across as an annoying, needy chatterbox trying to make new friends. Don’t say anything and you’re an unfriendly workout obsessed freak.

How loud should the music on your iPod be? Is it okay to sing-a-long? What about grunting and groaning when you’re lifting weights – is that acceptable or just showing off?

Should you keep your eyes fixed on an imaginary spot on the wall or is it OK to look around at other people ... and their bodies?

What I object to most is the person on the treadmill beside me glancing at my control panel to see if I’m going slower than they are.

I had some serious worries about all this last week when I found myself working out alongside Oasis singer Liam Gallagher.

He was up here for his band’s shows at the SECC and the hotel he was staying in happened to be attached to the fitness club I go to in Erskine.

The young boy at reception was bursting with excitement and told me who it was. I dashed into the changing rooms, tore off my work clothes and threw on my shorts, t-shirt and trainers in record time. I wanted to make sure I’d got started before Liam had finished.

As I pushed open the door and saw the man behind songs like Wonderwall, Some Might Say and Live Forever my head was filled with all these unwritten gym etiquette quandaries which I normally struggle with but knew I simply had to get right.

There’s a long list of people smarter than me who’ve invaded Liam Gallagher’s personal space and suffered a verbal bashing. I didn’t want to make my hero angry – not the night before a big gig.

What, if anything, was I supposed to say?

Should I swagger over and invite him on my radio show. That’s what an ambitious radio presenter would do isn’t it?

An interview with a big name would be good for ratings.

But what if Liam didn’t want yet another interview? What if he’d rather just work out in peace and quiet?

This might be the only part of the whole day he actually had to himself. Did I really want to be the guy who ruined that?

I knew what I had to do.

I nodded in Liam’s direction and started running. He got on with his weights. A few minutes later he walked past to get some water.

“Great album Liam,” I said. “I really like it.”

“Thanks man, that’s cool,” he replied.

As he sauntered off to the pool I found myself agreeing with him.

It was cool. I’d handled the situation perfectly. I, Colin Kelly, had become an expert in gym etiquette. I was cool. Liam Gallagher had said so.

It’s a good thing he didn’t see me an hour later in the changing rooms.

As I pulled my jeans out the locker around £5 worth of loose change came spilling out my pocket and went flying everywhere.

If he’d witnessed me scrambling around, trying to pick up all the shrapnel while keeping the towel round my waist, “cool” would have been the furthest word from his mind.

Source: icrenfrewshire.icnetwork.co.uk
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