Noel Gallagher's Tales From The Middle Of Nowhere (Vol.2) Part Thirty Two

From Noel Gallagher's 'Tales From The Middle Of Nowhere' tour diary.

Yes…

So, the gig here in Melbourne was great. (Yes, I'm still in Melbourne! They don't call this the Big Day Off for nothing.) It was at a place whose name escapes me just now, in a suburb called St. Kilda… A real saint? I think not. I mean, I'm no expert on the Bible, but when "they" forced us to study it at gunpoint at school I don't recall a St. Kilda.

The venue is most famous for having the oldest neon sign in the Southern Hemisphere!! (There's a little factoid for you.)

The gig was a bit weird to start with. It was all seated and the crowd remained so for the first three songs. It was like they were at the cinema… Now I know how the support band must've felt!

Anyway, I felt as though I must speak to these people…

"Do you HAVE to sit down?" I asked.

"NO!!" They shouted back as one.

"Well… Can you stand up, please?" I asked again, slightly annoyed.

"YISS," they replied in an Aussie accent and up they all stood… Just like that!! Now that did lead to some particularly bad dancing, I must say, but it was a price worth paying.

Wasn't much going on after the show so I legged it quick sharp.

Was up early yesterday. Went for a wander up town. Nothing to do, and all day to do it. Did pass a strange place which had a sign above the door that said, "VICTORIAN HOBBY CENTRE"?? What the fuck?? What do they do in there? Whip poor people? I was gonna go in to satisfy my curiosity but as I'm from the North they would've probably put me to work as a chimney sweep or a miner or a beggar.

Bumped into comrade Serge and another one of Kasabian, whose name I can never fucking remember. Had a bit of lunch… A mad Mexican, if you must know.

On the way back to my hotel I passed another establishment that had a sign over the door that said… "VICTORIAN DETECTIVE SERVICE"!!! What the fucking fuck?? Was there an actual Victorian detective inside? With a top hat? And a cane? And a monocle? Holding a massive magnifying glass?? I do hope so.

ONWARDS.

GD.

Source: www.noelgallagher.com

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